What's the worst that can happen?

1 year ago | saracen (Moderator)

I'll tell you. It happened on Sunday and I've been too upset to talk about it. I decided to try some 'Gravity Brewing'. By that I mean put the boiler up high, the mash tun a bit lower and the FV at the bottom. Great. All went well. Mash, sparge, drain into FV and transfer back to the boiler. My brewery is my kitchen, about 6 feet by 15 feet. I couldn't reach the boiler to tip the wort in because it was too high, so.... I got the step ladder which I bought in 1972 and by now is a bit wobbly. Now..... I KNOW this sounds silly NOW...... but it seemed OK at the time. I gently climbed the step ladder, carrying the FV, containing 18 lts of wort. The dog sat watching me. I managed 4 steps before the bloody ladder collapsed and 18 lts of wort went everywhere! Dog was drenched, CD tower full of it, washing machine full of it, worktops swimming, teabags floating and I sat on the floor wearing the FV as a hat!! 'Er indoors has started talking to me again today, but it's all a bit touch and go. Fortunately I managed to clear it up because I just couldn't face talking to the insurance company about it.

If you're not living on the edge..... you're taking up too much space!!

Planning: - To get some more brews on now the weather's a bit cooler
Fermenting: - Ginger Beer experiment
Conditioning: - A normal bitter with Styrians
Drinking: - All of it!!

E-mail: arnyfris@gmail.com

Read responses...

Responses

Hamish:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Thats bad, I feel for you.

You need a pump click...

Planning: Wheat beer fermented with Schneider Weisse yeast, a Stout, lots of hoppy pale ales
Fermenting: Summer pale ale
Maturing/Conditioning: Marynka pseudo-lager
Drinking: Wheat beer, ESB, Vienna lager & shop bought stuff

Steve_K:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

I can't say I didn't chuckle a little... but thoughts have now turned to mourning.

Planning: Hardcore IPA clone
Fermenting: Damson pale
Conditioning: Morello Cherry Lambic 2
Drinking: Schneider Weisse Tap 7 clone, Morello Cherry Lambic 1, Rauchbier

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Yes, it's times like this you wish someone had a video camera. We will be having a wake. Beer will flow ..... when I pluck up the courage to have another go ...... and 'er indoors is out.

Nath:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Hmmmm, Im relegated outside now because of brewing related problems. Still we live n learn. Im gonna get a 2020 pump but I need to make a spinney sparge arm first so I can brew on 1 level in my shed.

Drinkin' - nowt, it's all gone

Plannin'-
Loads a beer after an upgrade!

nathbrew@gmail.com

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

You have a SHED!?! You lucky devil! Know what I learned? Don't leave it 40 years to replace your step ladder!!

I DO like that pump. Excellent value.

Tony:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

Ooooowwwww that's terrible Saracen! What a nightmare. It it were me (and it could have so easily have been), the missus would scratch up a full 6 months before even uttering a sound in my direction - and then I'd need to have my fingers in my ears!

Hope you're ok!

Beer will get you through the times of no money better than money will get you through the times of no beer
(with grateful thanks to the Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers and slightly adapted)

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Thanks, Tony. Physically ... all OK. Emotionally .... getting there. It's a terrible loss. Such a waste. It was so good, and I nurtured it so long. I doubt if I'll ever get another step ladder like it.

Bazza:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

Glad you're okay, Saracen. Horrible thing to happen. Every brewer's wort - er - worst nightmare.

On a side note, how's the dog now? It's just that this is the only dog/beer-related story I've actually believed recently

-Barry

Planning: More SNPA, more experimental cider
Fermenting: Marston's Pedigree
Conditioning (Bottles): Warsteiner Lager Clone
Drinking (King Keg): Fullers London Pride

Neil:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

Saracen my heart sank when i read this story....18ltrs of wort down the drain and over you literally.

I've been relegated to outside for my next brew now Had a new kitchen installed so was relegated to the shed however, last brew i did was like a sauna and steam every where. Once the brew was over the steam had turned to water and it was like a swimming pool. The wife wasn't happy because there were clothes for the charity shop dripping wet..

Brownie points were severly damaged that day...!

Saracen i hope you've replaced your ladder and your other half lets you do another brew soon...

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Barry. Thanks for your concern. The dog's coming round. It was a shock for her, but there is a plus side. It took 2 baths to get the mess out of her fur, and she likes a bath. She's never been so clean. Perhaps I should put her in a show and see if we can win a gong. The kitchen was her favourite place but at the moment she sees it purely as a route to the garden, to be covered at very high speed.

Neil, I know exactly what you mean about the sauna, the rivers running down the walls and the constant whining from the non-brewing half of the partnership. No, haven't replaced the ladder. I've gone off them. In fact, in the last 4 years I've fallen off no less than 5 ladders causing 3 hospital visits with 1 ending as a stay of 3 weeks with a life threatening infection, 2 public liability insurance claims and new bonnet for my car when I landed on it. A few years ago I worked for Budget Rent-A-Car locally looking after the cars that went back from the fleet to the dealers. In 1 day my own car was written off when a new rental car fell off the transporter, I disappeared from sight whilst walking out the back of the depot through a rotten 8' x 4' sheet of ply which had for many years been hiding under leaves and covering a disused 10 foot deep cesspit, had to jump from a rental car I was driving across the yard when the wasps which had made a nest in the heater swarmed out of the heater vents and got blown across the room when the telephone I was using was struck by lightning! My boss stood shaking his head. "If it wasn't for bad luck, you wouldn't have any at all!" he said. No, I've finally got the message, so ladders and anything more than 6 feet off the ground are out of bounds from now on.

Neil:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

Christ Saracen....! Surprised you've not managed to kill yourself with all those accidents! Do you find everyone walks the opposite side of the road to you?

http://www.aviva.co.uk do good insurance just in case.

Glad all is sorted out now though..I don't particuarly want to brew outside too many nasties that are able to get into my brew for starters but the trouble and strife insists.. So my next planned brew a Guiness clone might have extra's in.

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Neil, you're not the first to express that sentiment. I have degree in 'Accident Prone'. One day, when it rains soup, I'll be the one with the fork!!
Thing is, we all do stupid things that seem ok at the time, secure in the knowledge our Guardian Angel will let no harm befall us...... until we choose to do it on their day off. If I was to tell you about cleaning out my mate's pond/small lake, you'd fall off your chair!

There was also the time in Menorca when an Eagle carrying a rabbit lost it's grip at 500 feet and the rabbit hit me on the head while I was sitting on a bar stool outside Manolo's in Son Bou. I was out cold for 5 minutes that time!... and I spilled my Miura!

Neil:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

I really shouldn't laugh i really shouldn't but the rabbit falling from 500ft tipped me over the edge almost literally.

I would say stay indoors but that would be dangerous too...

So have you thought about a name for your next brew?

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Bloody rabbit tipped me right off the bar stool. There was a picture in the local Spanish paper!

Staying indoors has had it's problems, too. A long time ago we moved house and I was determined to get a roll of carpet out of the loft. Briefly, I pulled, tugged, heaved.... and slipped. I crashed through the ceiling but this time I was lucky(?) I managed to have one leg either side of a joist which broke my fall!!

A name for a brew? Can't think.

Neil:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

Was thinking Lucky Jim

Tony:

Posted 1 year ago by Member

Oh Saracen, I have to sincerely apologise... I have tears in my eyes reading that ... and the rabbit just made me spill my tea.

How have you managed through it all? Does your wife keep her distance?

Beer will get you through the times of no money better than money will get you through the times of no beer
(with grateful thanks to the Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers and slightly adapted)

Nath:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Well I wish you the best of luck with what ever you do! Hit by a falling rabbit. Classic.

Drinkin' - nowt, it's all gone

Plannin'-
Loads a beer after an upgrade!

nathbrew@gmail.com

Greg:

Posted 1 year ago by Admin

Missed this thread the first time round, sorry to hear this Saracen but sounds like it could have been a lot worse.

There is nothing more messy than sticky wort all over the floor.

I've been banned from the house for a few years now and actually a lot easier working outside as any mess can be quickly hosed away without any problems. Also you avoid steaming the whole house.

I also like to see the reaction on my neighbours faces when they get that lovely brewery smell. They either love it or hate it.

saracen:

Posted 1 year ago by Moderator

Tony.

Does your wife keep her distance?

I suppose it's part of getting older but I do seem to have fewer friends now. Any suggestions I make for doing something exciting seem to fall on deaf ears. This is only a very short excerpt from a long list.
Do they still have rowing boats on the lake in Grovelands? I imagine they got rid of the one that sprang a plank (detached itself without warning whilst afloat). It was a long time ago. My first girlfriend. Vivien. Amazing... stunning .... gorgeous. I had been bitten by a squirrel so we went off the woods and decided to go rowing. It was great, gliding across the lake in the sun. "Sorry, dear. What water?" .......... short relationship.

Nath.

Hit by a falling rabbit. Classic.

It could have been a lot worse. Those eagles have been known to take new born lambs!!

Greg.

There is nothing more messy than sticky wort all over the floor.

Walls, Cooker, Washing Machine, drawers. The worst bit was sticking to the floor every time you walked across it for 2 days. Still, when the summer gets here I imagine the ants will find anything I've missed. I'm still finding the dried, sticky goo in places I didn't know we had a week later.
On the plus side, I think I might be onto something. The dog's fur is softer that it's ever been. I might do some shampoo experiments.

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